say yes to You
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Your 3 week journey to prioritising yourself without feeling guilty
Do you feel selfish for just thinking about putting yourself first, let alone actually doing it?
Lots of people jokingly call themselves a 'people-pleaser', assuming that working this hard to keep people happy and comfortable must just be who they are.
But here's what most people don't tell you - putting everyone first to the detriment of yourself isn't part of your personality, it's a habit you picked up, and you can absolutely learn how to break it.
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"I'm happy with anything, whatever you prefer"
Do you say things like this?
It's not just you.
Prioritising other people, making yourself available, being flexible and easygoing - you don't have to do these things for people to like and accept you.
But here's the thing: years and years of being like this (and all the positive feedback it gets) has taught you to think this is where your value comes from, and it's really hard to let that go.
Do you find yourself:
✦ Feeling disproportionately guilty for doing the smallest things for yourself
✦ Looking at a calendar full of plans you wish you hadn't said yes to
✦ Pretending to agree with people, not knowing what you really think and like
✦ Doing things you don't find fun, because other people wanted to
✦ Assuming things are your fault & saying sorry all the time
✦ Being super flexible to avoid being an inconvenience
Imagine instead being able to...
✦ Spend your time in ways that nourish you, without feeling bad
✦ Gently say no, without needing a 'valid' excuse
✦ Kindly ask for what you want - like tea, even if everyone else is having coffee
✦ Politely decline a work meeting or request - like if it'll mean staying late
✦ Confidently include your voice in discussions and when making plans
✦ Balance your energy and capacity between things for you, and care for others
...without questioning yourself, feeling guilty or worrying about upsetting people.
Maybe you have doubts, like:
✦ Will prioritising myself mean letting down the people who matter most to me? I don’t want to selfishly take anything away from them... ✦
Short answer: No! You can learn to prioritise your needs in a way that supports you AND is gentle & respectful of others :)
This is where Say Yes to You comes in 🧡
Your 3 week guide to gently prioritising yourself
(without feeling guilty or upsetting anyone)
✦ People-pleasing is a learned behaviour - not 'just part of being a kind person' - we learn to do it because it pleases people and that makes us feel good (!)
✦ It starts as something that helps us - we use it to get on with people, manage stress and cope with life.
✦ But it isn't sustainable. A huge personal cost comes from being there for others and abandoning ourselves. Most of us secretly feel disconnected, resentful and tired.
- People
✦ It's possible to stop people-pleasing (!) You can learn how to feel good about protecting your own wellbeing, without losing your natural warmth and kindness.
✦ Telling yourself to stop people-pleasing isn't helpful - the guilt and anxiety are too much. It's much more effective to focus on learning how to prioritise yourself, too.
What if I told you...
Through this powerful self-paced course, you'll:
➡️ Understand the root cause of your people-pleasing and discover why you feel such a strong need to please others. You'll feel lighter and freer.
➡️ Learn to recognise & meet your needs, and build your self-worth. Imagine feeling deserving of putting yourself first, instead of lying awake at night feeling guilty.
➡️ Develop a kinder relationship with yourself, so self-care feels natural and necessary, rather than selfish and indulgent. Picture feeling genuinely good about prioritising your own wellbeing.
Inside, you'll find:
✨ 9 mini podcast teachings (perfect with a cuppa!)
✨ 12 reflection exercises & journal prompts
✨ A printable workbook, with examples, transcripts and space to complete the exercises
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Hello - I'm Elsie Owen, the Psychotherapist behind Say Yes to You.
As a therapist and recovering people-pleaser, I know how exhausting it is to constantly put others first. My pleasing was marked by unbalanced relationships, hyper-attunement to others' needs, and complete disconnection from myself.
Through therapy, I discovered that prioritising myself didn't mean becoming selfish – it just meant finding a way to include myself in the care and kindness I give everyone else.
Now, with nearly a decade of experience helping others make this same transformation, I've created Say Yes to You, a course designed to help fellow people-pleasers reclaim their lives, too.
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Who is this course designed for?This course is ideal for people who have a tendency to put other people first, leading them to feel anxious, stressed and resentful, and would LOVE to be able to prioritise their own needs without feeling guilty.
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What's the difference between a course and therapy?This course is a psycho-educational resource focused on understanding and overcoming people-pleasing tendencies, for educational purposes only. This course is not an appropriate substitute for therapeutic treatment, a therapeutic relationship, or formal medical or mental health care. Therapy is a professional relationship, tailored to your goals and needs, offering in-depth support. Some people sign up for the course alongside therapy. While it's not a replacement for therapeutic support, it can complement the work you’re already doing really nicely. I always suggest letting your therapist know you’re working through the content!
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I feel guilty spending money on myself - how do I know if it's worth it?It's so common to question investing in yourself when people-pleasing is a pattern - that hesitation is part of what we'll be working on together. You might consider: How easily would you make a similar investment for someone you love? What's the cost of continuing to put everyone else first? (time, burnout, stress, your happiness?) Breaking this down, it's about £5.70 per day for the structured course period - basically a posh coffee out (therapy with me is £95 a session). You get lifetime access, meaning you can revisit these tools and teachings whenever you need them. The skills you'll learn will serve you in every relationship and situation going forward. They may just change your life!
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What format is the course in?There's 3 weeks of content, but it's totally self-guided, so you can progress at your own pace. The course includes audio sessions (max 8 mins), a comprehensive workbook with all the content in written form, and journal prompts and exercises. You can engage in whatever way feels most helpful - listening, reading, writing, or a combo.
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How much time do I need to set aside each day?About 15 minutes, which works nicely with a cuppa!
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How long will I have access for?Lifetime! So take as much time as you need. There's no rush, and you can revisit materials as often as needed.
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What topics are covered?You'll explore the roots of people-pleasing, techniques to identify and express your own needs, and strategies to build self-worth and set healthy boundaries.
-
What if I need support while doing the course?While this is a self-study course, you're welcome to reach out with any technical questions. For emotional support during this process, I encourage connecting with your existing support system, whether that's friends, family, or your therapist.
-
What is your refund policy?The course is non refundable. If you are unsure if this course will be of value, please contact me at info@elsieowen.com and I will be happy to answer any questions and support you as best as possible with your decision!
-
Who is this course designed for?This course is ideal for people who have a tendency to put other people first, leading them to feel anxious, stressed and resentful, and would LOVE to be able to prioritise their own needs without feeling guilty.
-
What's the difference between a course and therapy?This course is a psycho-educational resource focused on understanding and overcoming people-pleasing tendencies, for educational purposes only. This course is not an appropriate substitute for therapeutic treatment, a therapeutic relationship, or formal medical or mental health care. Therapy is a professional relationship, tailored to your goals and needs, offering in-depth support. Some people sign up for the course alongside therapy. While it's not a replacement for therapeutic support, it can complement the work you’re already doing really nicely. I always suggest letting your therapist know you’re working through the content!
-
I feel guilty spending money on myself - how do I know if it's worth it?It's so common to question investing in yourself when people-pleasing is a pattern - that hesitation is part of what we'll be working on together. You might consider: How easily would you make a similar investment for someone you love? What's the cost of continuing to put everyone else first? (time, burnout, stress, your happiness?) Breaking this down, it's about £5.70 per day for the structured course period - basically a posh coffee out (therapy with me is £95 a session). You get lifetime access, meaning you can revisit these tools and teachings whenever you need them. The skills you'll learn will serve you in every relationship and situation going forward. They may just change your life!
-
What format is the course in?There's 3 weeks of content, but it's totally self-guided, so you can progress at your own pace. The course includes audio sessions (max 8 mins), a comprehensive workbook with all the content in written form, and journal prompts and exercises. You can engage in whatever way feels most helpful - listening, reading, writing, or a combo.
-
How much time do I need to set aside each day?About 15 minutes, which works nicely with a cuppa!
-
How long will I have access for?Lifetime! So take as much time as you need. There's no rush, and you can revisit materials as often as needed.
-
What topics are covered?You'll explore the roots of people-pleasing, techniques to identify and express your own needs, and strategies to build self-worth and set healthy boundaries.
-
What if I need support while doing the course?While this is a self-study course, you're welcome to reach out with any technical questions. For emotional support during this process, I encourage connecting with your existing support system, whether that's friends, family, or your therapist.
-
What is your refund policy?The course is non refundable. If you are unsure if this course will be of value, please contact me at info@elsieowen.com and I will be happy to answer any questions and support you as best as possible with your decision!